So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize
