Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
