The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I puked a lego.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
