I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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