As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
i drank out of a bidet.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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