dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
