she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
