Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
