i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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