Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
