im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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