I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I showed him my bush... on skype.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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