Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
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