I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
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