3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
is wine microwaveable?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
Randomize
