no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Randomize