To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
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