I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
