Do you still have your period?
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
