I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
