So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
