margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
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