dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
