Moan for me like Helen Keller
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
