I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
