Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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