At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
