somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
im holly from the hills drunk
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
