filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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