I like to think it a success when the cops are called
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
