We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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