So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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