One girl and one boy is just not enough.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
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