Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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