i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
