# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
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