$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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