It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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