i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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