idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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