her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
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