Where are you?
In a non slutty way
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
