Operation Purity has been aborted
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
You dont lie about slip and slides
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
