it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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