It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize