remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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