come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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