Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
