the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
