We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize