hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
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