Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize
